November 15, 2004
Soros: "Hello Barack. Here's the deal. I've had my eye on you since your speech in July. Kerry dropped the ball. He doesn't have what you have. He doesn't have the polish or charisma you've got. Did you know I spent 100 million dollars trying to get him elected?"
Obama: "No. I had heard you spent a sizable amount of your own money."
Soros: "Yes. A man doesn't spend that kind of money lightly. I expected to get a return on that investment. Do you think you will be able to go the distance for me in 2008?"
Obama: "I think I'm up to the task. What exactly are you offering me?"
Soros: "I will spend 100 million or more of my money to elect you President. Without the money you don't stand a chance in hell of getting elected President for another twenty years. But let's make it really clear, this isn't a gift. I don't throw 100 million dollars away just so you get to be President. I expect a return."
Obama: "Sure. But what exactly do you mean by a return? Do you expect me to pay the money back to you plus interest?"
Soros: "No. I can always make more money and break more currencies around the world. That's easy enough. I need someone in the Presidency who will enact my agenda. Let's make it real clear. If you want this, you have to abide by my conditions. Otherwise I'll find someone else. You still interested?"
Obama: "I'm listening. I didn't get to where I am by being inflexible and unable to negotiate. I'm a practical man. What are your conditions?"
Soros: "I have three major goals for the United States. The first, is I want the banks to be owned by the state. Second, I want to nationalize the car industry and the health care industry. And lastly I want to open the borders on the south to permit more Mexicans to populate the United States and amnesty for the ones already there illegally.
Obama: "How the heck do you expect me to be able to do all that? Even if I am President, the banks and the car industry will never roll over and be nationalized! Health care might be doable, but you saw the resistance it encountered when Hillary tried it. And as for the borders, that's easy enough, but why?"
Soros: "Trust me. When the time comes for each of these events, I will let you know what you need to do. My hedge fund controls most of the refined oil in the world and controls more every day. We've raised gas prices through the roof in the US and Europe for over half a decade now. The auto empires are failing. Sales are down. When their debt rises they will seek a bailout. And that is when you nationalize them. The auto industry and healthcare industry are responsible for a 1/3 of the jobs in the United states."
Obama: "And the banks? When exactly are they going to come to me for aid?"
Soros: "Leave that to me. There will be a bubble popped just as Bush leaves office. That's all you need to know."
Obama: "You never answered my question about the border. Why do I need to leave the southern border open?"
Soros: "Because, the United States will never willfully accept socialism with its current make up. Illegal Mexicans and their offspring will change the balance of power. They will finally tip the scale in favor of the Democratic party and there will be only one real party. Then the United States will cease to be a threat to the rest of the world. The US owes the world an apology. You will be that apology."
Obama: "Okay, let me get this straight. You will spend 100 million of your own money just so you can watch me destroy America for you?"
Soros: "I will have spent 200 million by the time of your inauguration. And I'm not going to destroy America...I'm going to "CHANGE" it."
Soros: "Yes. Change. It will change anyway. Most of the changes I will facilitate would probably happen anyway. I am merely speeding them up by a 100 years. Change is inevitable. The USA will not always be bossing around other nations and the US citizens should not live like kings while the rest of the world lives in squalor. Things must change. Come to think of it...I think that will be your running slogan: "Change", it has a great ring to it - and it will be true. You will be the harbinger of change.
So are you in? Yes or no. There is no 'maybe' or 'I'll think about it', I want someone decisive. Literally, a million other guys would kill for this opportunity. Are you in?"
Obama: "I'm in."
Soros: "Good. I'll have you over for brunch soon and we will work out the details."
The above transcript was obtained at great cost. Teleportation to a parallel universe, time travel and all the accoutrements generate unfathomable expenditures. ;-)