Thursday, April 28, 2005

The Room

The room is bright. Lighter than human eyes are designed to tolerate. The light seemed to come from everywhere and nowhere at the same time. The high-rise is the tallest in the worlds and is where my employers maintain their offices.

I enter the room and walk towards my employers. The decor is modern ethereal: lots of white furniture, integrated fixtures and all wrapped up with a supreme sense of purpose and efficiency.

I acknowledge, with a smile and a nod, a few co-workers I haven't seen in awhile. They do deep undercover work and sometimes it's months and even years--or longer--between assignments.

At the end of the room are four chairs. All white. Deco or post-moderne don't begin to describe them and I really don't know where to start to try, so I wont.

The Board of Directors is composed of two men and two women. All quite brilliant-- brilliant to the point of intimidating even, if it weren't for their demeanor which discarded even the hint of aloofness or superiority.

A very tall gentlemen arises from the second chair from the left. "Ah, SDAI-Tech1, its nice of you to meet us like this on such short notice."

"It was no problem. Teleportation always sharpens the senses."

"Yes. Well, we called you here for a performance evaluation. Your file here indicates you've broken a few protocols. Were you aware of this?"

"Yes. Ahem...there were a few instances when I made judgment calls in the field that were not as well thought out as they could have been, I had meant to discuss them earlier."

A golden blond woman on the far right turns to me and speaks, "Your record here is starting to show a pattern of unconventional and erratic decisions. I think we should review these individually and see if we can clarify what you were thinking when you made these choices."

"That's fine with me."

"Good. Why don't you have a seat."

A white seat that wasn't there emerges out of the floor. No trap panels or anything - it has either been teleported to the position behind me or had been morphed out of the existing molecules of the air--I can't tell which occurred. I sit and the seat feels as if it has molded to my shape. Extremely comfortable.

"So tell us...when did you decide to start a blog?"

"Ahem. Well I believe it was April of 2004. I felt it might be a useful tool to disperse data. I had intended to filter entries here first, but didn't want to waste anyone's time reading what was mostly going to be material-centric stuff of little concern with a few tidbits thrown in for good measure."

"Let's see in your last entry you disparage Earth's 1.1 billion Roman Catholics-don't you think that's unnecessary and unorthodox?"

"I might've overdone the ignorance bit."

"You think? That entry alone breaks a half dozen specific protocols for the dissemination of data. Your blog is chock-full of small and large violations of company policy."

I suddenly realize that my activities have been thoroughly investigated. And as I think about it I really expected no less.

"You influenced the election with your blog?"

"Well...somewhat. I played a small role."

The blond woman pushes the point home. "You knew exactly how history was going to unfold and you influenced it deliberately. You targeted Ohio as the pivot point and swayed hundreds of thousands of voters with a series of key blog entries based on post-election voter survey issues you knew were of concern to the region. What was the basis of your reasoning for this decision?"

"I didn't like Kerry."

"You took it upon yourself to weave a whole new timestream. Have you any idea what repercussions your actions will have? And what about the readers of your blog? Are you going to individually assist each that you force-evolutionary-accelerate? And what of those who are traumatized by such relevations? Do you have a plan for balancing these individuals course?"

"They think it's all a joke. Most don't believe a word I say. I can't believe any are traumatized by anything I have written."

A gentleman who has been silent the whole while turns and stares at me with great concern and he speaks, "You'd be quite wrong. Let's take a look shall we?"

A holograph of the Earth appears just above my lap. About a foot in diameter, it sparkles an iridescent blue so real I reach out and touch it just to be certain it isn't solid.

"Take a look at the people who now are in a state of intellectual and spiritual turmoil due to your blog entries."

Little red dots appear and light up one by one, mostly in the US and Europe, and only after a minute or two does it subside the last light being added in Norway. The globe disappears as silently as it appeared.

"That's 51,246 people. Their lives directly influence another 34,785,237 and those lives influence the entire population of the Earth. Your 'blog' is a problem of epic proportions. I have a hard time believing you were unaware of these repercussions when you initiated your blog."

I stare at the unemotional faces. There is not a hint of anger, exasperation or frustration upon their countenance. I realize I have no alternative but to accept their determinations.

"Ok. I made a mistake or two with the blog...so what do I do?"

The blond woman, who is stunningly attractive by the way, turns and smiles, "You will have to oversee that certain fluctuations in this new timestream you have generated stabilize till they are within acceptable parameters. You will have to balance the evolutionary needs of these 51,246 individuals and orchestrate assistance for each one. We'll handle the auxiliary influences of your decisions. Do you have any idea how you are going to do this most expeditiously?"


I smile and get up from the chair.

"Of course. The blog got me into this mess - I'll blog my way to a solution."

The chair has vanished. In a moment so have I.

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