Sunday, July 23, 2006

Calling all Supermodels & Hollywood's Facade

This is another curtain lifter for folks who may not be aware of these things. Hollywood is short. VERY short. Hollywood celebrities when you meet them in real life always are a let down, in a major way. They look like they suffer from dwarfism or some height inhibiting disease. "Why is this?" You ask? Well, I suppose it's long overdue to put into writing Hollywood's biggest secret and how it became a land of little people with big egos.

When the film colonies began in the 1920's around Hollywood, California the silent pictures required nothing more than people who would look good on film. People were not too tall in those days either and so an average male might be about 5' 4 inches tall. On film, taller people don't photograph as well. The first motion cameras were mounted on standard tripods and tall people looked like they had double-chins because the camera height was below eye level. Very quickly they discovered that shorter people looked better on film. So the average actors height was about 5 feet tall and the actresses could not tower over the men so they had to be 4 feet and something to look good next to the lead man.

Unfortunately a chain reaction effect multiplied this effect. When a male lead was only 5' 2 they needed supporting men and women who were shorter to make him look good. However, when any one of these supporting actors became popular in his/her own right and starred in films of their own - they needed even shorter actors to support them...and on and on it went. So Hollywood has perpetually lied about the actors and actresses height and when you meet them in real life, even when they wear special made lifts they are still amazingly short and nowhere near the claimed height the studios and agents declare.

Most actors in Hollywood are around 5 feet tall. Most actresses are 4 feet 10 and under. That celebrities are actually far shorter than the average male and female now and by most standards would be considered inferior physical types is one of the delicious ironies of Hollywood. Here companies can make the masses idolize, envy and pay attention to folks who are below the norm physical specimens. In fact, they can make normal folks believe they want to look and act like these celebrities! The power of the print image helps sustain the false image.

Folks always wonder why models don't get into movies more often. Models are way too tall for films! Supermodels are a head and a half taller than the female actresses and nearly a foot taller than most male leads. Cindy Crawford made one film and it was so much trouble to cast because of her height, and because it didn't make enough box-office return, no one was going to go through that sort of hassle again. Paulina Porizkova made a few films and casting those was equally difficult. There are very few male leads that are anywhere near six feet tall.

The whole height lie makes things a mess. When an actor really is 6 feet tall, they have to be declared to be 6'5" or 6'4 because the 5'2 guys they declare 6 feet tall are going to be eye-to shoulder with him. One lie leads to the next and on and on it goes.

So that's why you don't really ever see the beautiful people on film. You see the better looking short people. Supermodels will never appear in films in any major way, unless they start making their own films and create a whole new standard. The current studios can't get away from the shorter and shorter trend because of the way the system works. Agents eyes gravitate to very short people - because short is in demand. Average people just aren't short enough. This makes the agents and casting directors have to work harder to find new talent who can appear alongside the current crop of very short actors/actresses and why Hollywood has perpetually been in such a "rut".

All the gossip mags, award shows and magazines are desperately needed by Hollywood to keep these folks in the public eye. Because real life appearances tend to only lose these folks fans. Hollywood types don't take to well when their shortness is publicly commented upon. For example,during a live Jay Leno Las Vegas Tonight Show telecast several years back, a woman in the audience who declared, "I can't believe how short you are...not what I expected at all!" Jay responded with "Well you're ugly!" - not one of his smoother exchanges but it ticked him off because it couldn't be edited out of a live telecast. Word of advice - if you meet any actors/actresses don't make any comments about your shock at their true height.

So the message for today is cancel your subscriptions to Entertainment, Premiere, US, People, OK! and any other publications that mock your intellect and foster adulation of folks eminently unworthy of your time and thoughts. Watch less TV, see less films and read more books and end any celebrity worship you may be caught up in - if any - and you will find you have much more time on your hands to pursue more intelligent goals and will not just be one of the masses walking around aimlessly with the wool pulled down over their eyes.

While many don't fit this description, including most of my readers, every anti-TV & film message is the moral equivalent of a mental health public service announcement.

(Yes, I wrote this piece specifically for my supermodel girlfriend who was told she was too tall for films)

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