Thursday, January 01, 2009

Lies

Truth is a very important commodity. Most civilized people realize deception always backfires.

Though as much as we may value truth as a culture, it is amazing the sheer quantity of lies we produce.

Children are instructed to lie and deceive by parents who lie and deceive. Politicians lie and deceive almost constantly, a different lie for whomever they are currently addressing.

Lying is morally insidious because it spirals down to further lies and often eventually even criminal activity. The man who can lie to his wife, children has no problem lying to his teachers and employers. The lies just keep compounding. Pretty soon they can steal from their extended family and their employer and not think twice about it. When you are already engaged in constant lies - trickery and deception are your trades. The leap to theft is a small one when one has slowly destroyed your core of morality. And then after petty theft it may evolve into grand larceny and other felony crimes. Eventually even murder is not that great a leap, because the slippery slope of dishonesty always gets one into deeper and deeper trouble. Each law - each moral fortitude - becomes easier and easier to break when you start with the simple little "white" lie.

When one lies one pushes away those who speak truth and attracts only other liars. Pretty soon the lives of a liar are filled completely with people who are equally dishonest. This tends to compound their problem because they "see" dishonesty everywhere they turn - and so buried are they knee deep in liars, that they world of honest people is like some mythical and faraway land, whereas the land of liars is their homeland.

And what of the children of these types? How on Earth do they reconcile their lives when they have no positive and honest role models to speak of? When their parents are morally bankrupt what sort of people do they become? What happens to their self-esteem? When life, as far as they have witnessed it in their family becomes all about deceiving others simply to further your own selfish ends? The answer is generally depressing. The brighter children may resent this dysfunctional existence & rebel against their parents and see in them many flaws, but the bottom line is they have known little else and usually end up imitating them. Like a computer program with only one set of experience data they have nothing else to base their own relationships upon.

The son of the abandoned woman may plan not to walk out his children and wife the way his dad did on his mother, but more likely than not he will do the exact same thing and justify it because after all his dad did it, he doesn't love the "scheming" mother trying to entrap him and hey - life is tough.

The son of alcoholics may hate the way they were treated by their parents, they run away ASAP, join gangs and do drugs and alcohol and "rebel" against their abusive parents while unknowingly become mirror images of them. Before they know it they are tied down in a miserable marriage and have kids that they ignore and abuse.

The abused child seeks solace and affirmation outside the home and attract relationships and eventually a marriage that is just as abusive and dysfunctional. They end up abusing their kids - intentionally or not.

The unloved child seeks love outside the home and find themselves in exactly the same position - in relationships with those who do not love them. Before they know it - they are the unloving parents and the cycle has regenerated.

Yes, sadly the children often mimic their parents even when its the very last thing they want to do.

So one generation of liars spawns another generation. Truth is now a liability - an inconvenience. The ability to lie well becomes an ever larger facet of their lives. And each time they lie, they slide down deeper into that moral abyss and their lives always seem to be miserable.

And yet not one of them - have even the vaguest clue as to why life seems to be falling apart for them and how they are responsible for their own decline.

You MUST become the sort of person you want to be surrounded by. If you are needy - you will be surrounded by needy people. If you lie, you will be surrounded by liars. If you are emotionally insecure - you will be surrounded by these types. If you are critical - you will be surrounded by the same. If you are unhappy - you will be surrounded by the same. If you are selfish, greedy or are a materialist - these will be the types in your immediate social network.


See how it works? Everything is frequency relationship. There are no gods who punish you for your sins. You do this to yourself. Constantly.


Do you want to be around honest people?

Be honest.

Do you want to be loved?

Love others.

Do you want to be around caring people?

Care.

Do you want to be around fun people?

Be fun.

Do you want to be around good people?

Be good.

Do you want to be around generous people?

Be generous.

If you feel you are being shortchanged by your environment, look closer at yourself. Look a lot closer if necessary. No one likes being told they are the cause of all their own problems - but it is the truth.

If you are unhappily married, have a terrible job, feel you are underappreciated and that everyone is conspiring to make your life miserable - check your premises.

If you are lonely, friendless, feel life is passing you by and are awaiting "mr./ms. Right" to come along and save you from your miserable existence - expect one long wait. All you will attract unto you are other "lonely, friendless types" who feel exactly as you do and have no idea why are *really* unhappy. And although misery loves company - who wants to be in such company?

If you want a happy, constructive life and desire peace of mind, stop lying. That's the first step. The "small" lies start the rot in ones soul. Becoming mentally healthy again and attracting other happy, well-adjusted and honest people requires one no longer becomes a willing agent of untruth.

I don't write these entries to hurt my readers feelings. I don't write them to lift myself up and tear others down. I don't want to increase anyone's feelings of insecurities or unhappiness. I write these entries because they are the truth. There always must exist an outlet for such unfiltered, un-pc truth. Even here on the internet of endless deception!

That's what you get here on this blog - unrelenting, unedited (and often unpopular) truth.

Congratulations! You earned reading this.

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